Building Character: Should Integrity be Instilled in Today’s Youth?
Before we begin…
Today’s article addresses integrity. It’s a follow-up to an email from a teacher who shared about a situation in his classroom. You can read the details in the “Let me tell you...” section and comment on the “Care to Share” page.
Let’s Talk Leadership!
What is the Relationship Between Integrity and Leadership?
Integrity is one of the foundational qualities that shapes effective leadership. Without integrity, there is no moral compass. And a moral compass is necessary to guide effectively. Integrity and Leadership are deeply intertwined. Here is more on this relationship.
Trust Building
Integrity fosters trust. When you consistently act with honesty, transparency, and fairness, people are more likely to trust you.
Consistency in Decision-Making
With integrity you make decisions based on principles rather than convenience. This consistency helps others understand what to expect and allows them to align their actions with your values.
Role Modeling
As a leader you set the tone, when you act with integrity. You serve as a role model, and encourage your teams to uphold similar standards of honesty and ethics.
Credibility and Influence
Integrity enhances your credibility. When you stand by your word and own up to your mistakes you are more credible and earn greater respect. This in turn amplifies your influence.
Ethical Leadership
With integrity you are more likely to lead ethically and consider the greater good. This ensures your leadership is sustainable. It positively impacts the people you serve.
How Can Integrity Be Instilled in Today’s Youth?
Instilling integrity in teenagers is crucial because it shapes their character and future decision-making. Here are some ways to nurture integrity in teens.
Model Integrity
Teens learn by example. When parents, teachers, or mentors consistently demonstrate honesty, responsibility, and ethical behavior, teens are more likely to adopt those values. It sets a strong example when they see you standing up for what’s right, even if it’s difficult,
Open Conversations About Values
Talk to teens about the importance of integrity. Explain why honesty, fairness, and accountability matter in real world situations. Encourage discussions about ethical dilemmas to help them think critically about their choices.
Encourage Accountability
Teach them to take responsibility for their actions, both good and bad. If they make mistakes, emphasize learning from them rather than deflecting blame. Accountability fosters maturity and self-respect.
Reward Honesty
Recognize when teens act with integrity, even in small moments. Positive reinforcement for honesty and ethical behavior can make them feel proud and more likely to repeat those actions.
Provide Opportunities for Ethical Decision-Making
Give teens the chance to make decisions where they must weigh right and wrong. Whether it’s in school, sports, or at home, let them experience the consequences of their choices. It helps build their moral compass.
Discuss Real-life Examples
Use stories from current events, history, or even their own lives to highlight the value of integrity and the cost of dishonesty. Show them how integrity leads to trust and respect, while dishonesty can damage reputations and relationships.
Promote Empathy
Help teens understand the impact of their actions on others. When they can see situations from another person’s perspective, they’re more likely to act in fairness and kindness, which is at the heart of integrity.
Care to Share? Let me know if you think teens today are getting enough guidance on integrity?
Let Me Tell You…
About a teacher discouraged by an incident that happened in his classroom. He caught some high school students cheating and brought it to their attention. “Soon you will be in the workplace,” he advised. “And you will need a good work ethic.” He explained the importance of integrity, and a moral compass, and the impact of these at work.
A couple of days later, he got a call from administration who let him know that parents complained about him mistreating their son. The parents claimed, the teacher had called their son names that were very inappropriate! “It was totally untrue, even surreal,” the teacher recalls.
In disbelief, he requested the parents be called so he could speak to them. “It was hard to even get a word in,” he wrote. The father was disrespectful from the beginning —talking loudly and too fast to interrupt. “I raised my son right, and you have no business accusing my son of cheating,” the father shouted. “And you don’t worry about where my son will be working, it’s not your job to worry about his future!”
“It was discouraging,” the teacher wrote. How do I do my job without teaching values? (It’s worth noting, he teaches Career Readiness).
Should I just stop teaching integrity?
My response is,“No, you shouldn’t give up teaching integrity. The lessons you’re teaching are foundational for their growth, even if it’s frustrating when they don’t respond and the results aren’t immediately visible.
But in this situation, the parents don’t care that I teach integrity.
It can be challenging to reinforce values in teens, especially when parents don’t prioritize integrity—but even with that —it’s not impossible. As an educator, you can still make a difference:
Be a Consistent Role Model
Even if teens aren’t seeing integrity at home, they can learn it from you. Demonstrate honesty, fairness, and ethical behavior consistently to help reinforce the importance of these values. Teens often look up to teachers or coaches for guidance when they lack it at home.
Create a Safe, Values-based Environment
In your classroom, establish a culture where integrity is valued. Encourage respect, fairness and accountability. When teens experience a positive environment where honesty and ethical behavior are expected, it reinforces those principles regardless of what they see at home.
Teach Through Real-Life Scenarios
Use examples from history, or current events to show the real consequences of integrity or lack thereof. When teens see how dishonesty and unethical behavior can harm others it makes the importance of integrity more tangible.
Offer Individualized Guidance
Some teens need more personalized support. Having one to one conversations about personal responsibility, choices, and long-term consequences can help guide them. Sometimes, even when parents don’t reinforce these values, teens will appreciate the guidance from another trusted adult.
Use Peer Influence
Teens are highly influenced by their peers. Encourage group activities where they can witness integrity in actions from others their age. Peer-led discussions displaying integrity can have a strong impact.
Provide External Role Models
Highlight stories of people who demonstrate strong integrity. Sometimes teens need to see relatable examples outside of their immediate family to understand the importance of living ethically.
Focus on Building Self-Respect
Teach teens that integrity is tied to self-worth. When they act with honesty and accountability, they build confidence in themselves. This leads to greater resilience, even if they don’t have parental support.
It can be frustrating without parental support, but your influence matters more than you realize. Teens often seek guidance from adults outside their families when they’re looking for direction. Even if it seems like the lessons aren’t clicking now, you’re helping them build a foundation they can come back to.
It can be discouraging when teens don’t respond to integrity lessons, but there are strategies to help get through to them. Here are some approaches:
Find What Motivates Them
Teens are often more responsive to lessons when they understand how it affects their lives. Frame integrity in terms of what matters to them—whether it’s trust in friendships, respect from peers, or success in the long term. Show how integrity impacts those things.
Focus On the Long Run
Teens don’t always show immediate signs of understanding, but that doesn’t mean the lessons aren’t sinking in. Keep planting the seeds. Sometimes they need time to reflect or experience the real-world consequences of dishonesty or poor character before they appreciate the value of integrity.
Use Relatable Examples
If traditional lessons aren’t working, incorporate examples from pop culture, social media, or stories they care about. If you can tie integrity to their world-celebrities, athletes, or influencers-it can make the concept feel more relevant.
Create Real Consequences
Sometimes teens don’t take integrity seriously until they see its direct impact. Set clear, consistent consequences for dishonesty or unethical behavior in your environment. Make sure they understand that integrity is about everyday decisions and their impact.
Let Them Experience Failure
Some teens only learn through experience. If they make a poor choice, don’t rush to shield them from the consequences. Let them face the fallout and then use it as a teaching moment. Reflection after failure often hits harder than any lecture.
Encourage Self-reflection
Help them look inward. Ask them questions about how their actions make them feel about themselves. Journaling or private reflection exercises can help teens understand that integrity is about how they view themselves— and not how others view them.
Build Trust First
Sometimes teens resist lessons because they feel judged. Building trust by showing them you’re on their side and genuinely care about their well-being can make them more open to hearing what you have to say about integrity.
Use Group Dynamics
If one-on-one lessons aren’t working, harness the power of the group. Peer pressure can be powerful, and teens often want to fit in. Create a culture where honesty and fairness are cool and socially rewarded. Praise students who model integrity and let their peers witness it.
Stay committed to teaching integrity, even when it feels thankless. It’s one of the most impactful things you can do. Sometimes the reward is delayed, but the ripple effects can be profound.
Have a good weekend!
—-Dr. Aguilar
